Haruhi's Harem
by Cookie to Seki na
Summary: Haruhi's secret is revealed and the whole school thinks the Host Club is her male harem! After a game set up by the Hitachiin Twins, the Host Club is in a competition to see who pairs the best with Haruhi.
1. Chapter 1

…**The most I've got to say is that this my first OHSHC fanfiction, but not my first as a whole. Hopefully, I portrayed the characters right o.o;**

"Hey! Did you hear…?" and "No way!" were the most common phrases used as Haruhi passed through Ouran towards the Third Music Room where the Host Club was waiting for her. Deciding to shrug off whatever rumor was going through the school, not that she cared to listen anyway, she pushed open the large doors leading to the club she was forced to join.

Funny, there wasn't a "welcome" being chorused anywhere. Haruhi peered inside cautiously, wondering where the usual greeting went. Taking a step inside was mistake number one as Tamaki decided to jump out ever so frighteningly, causing poor Haruhi to have a heart attack.

"My dear Daughter!! Thank goodness!" Tamaki yelled as he was soon joined by the Hitachiin Twins.

"Ugh…! Tamaki-senpai! Let go!" Haruhi grumbled as Tamaki refused to do such. She noticed, though it took a lot of effort, that Hikaru and Kaoru were crying fake tears, standing near Tamaki and promptly rubbing themselves on either side of her, though Tamaki was trying to fend them off. The rest of the club had joined the crying group, though Hunny looked ready to cry too as he clutched his rabbit with such force, the arm was threatening to come off.

"What's going on?" Haruhi urged out as she had gotten Tamaki off by pinching the back of his hand. She had absolutely no clue as to what was happening.

"Haru-chan!!" Hunny shouted as he threw himself onto her, surprising her but not answering her question at all. Her eyes turned to Kyoya, who was standing with them, his notebook not opened nor his laptop out. Giving him a questioning look, he readjusted his glasses and cleared his throat.

"Haruhi, it seems that the entire school seems to have found that you are female."

"…eh?" Silence flooded the room as Haruhi took as much time as needed to process what he just said into her mind. So the whole school knew? What about it?

"You do know what this means, right?" Kyoya asked, the rest of the club giving her a look that made realization hit her like a ton of bricks.

"That means I can't be in the host club anymore, right?"

"That's correct." Silence ensued them all once more until Tamaki broke out into sobs, engulfing Haruhi in another bone crushing hug. Struggling to breath, she found a way to pop herself out of his grasp.

"So…this means I can't pay off my debt, right?" Haruhi seemed more worried about the debt than all else at the moment, sending a pang of hurt throughout the twins and Tamaki.

"Yes, Haruhi. That means you are free of your debt, as well as the host club. I suggest leaving in the next thirty seconds," Kyoya pointed out, which got him a confused look from Haruhi. A bit shocked, Haruhi didn't notice the large doors behind her burst open, a mob of screaming fangrils immediately filling the room.

"Ah!" Haruhi called in despair as she jumped to a side to avoid being trampled over. Throughout the crowd, the club could hear the girls yelling out for Haruhi, which caught the attention of said host. Standing up and brushing herself off, Haruhi looked at the crowd, which had, in turn, stared back at her with wonder. A bit nervous and scared, Haruhi just stood there, staring into the sea of girls and, surprisingly, boys.

"Haruhi-kun! Is it true that you're a girl?!" A brave soul ventured as Haruhi just stood there, shell-shocked. Turning her head back to the club behind her, she shot them looks that just screamed "Help me!" at them.

"Well, Haruhi. Are you going to tell them the truth?" Kyoya pushed, making Haruhi attempt a glare with however much strength she had left.

"Uh…yes?" That sent the crowd in an uproar as the host club froze behind her. Half of them had expected her to say no. Suddenly clutching onto Haruhi, Tamaki shook her until her brain felt too rattled to think.

"Haruhi!" Tamaki yelled at her desperately, though her brain was so shaken she didn't care to listen.

"Haruhi! You could've told them you weren't a girl!" Hikaru yelled at her, though she had probably already let her mind float away.

"How did this information leak out in the first place?" Kyoya wondered as everybody in the room looked at him. Then, this boy came bounding to the front of the crowd, in his hand was something everyone in the host club feared: a camera.

"With this!" The boy proclaimed as he held the camera up proudly. Everybody was staring up at it at this point.

"I was wandering around school this afternoon…" the boy started as everyone listened intently to his story.

_FLASHBACK TO AN HOUR EARLIER_

_I was wandering around the school and I happened to run into Fujioka-san in the hallway, spilling a cup of tea I had with me at the moment. The tea spilled all over him, or her, and I quickly stood up to apologize._

_"I'm sorry!" I bowed deeply as Haruhi stood up and smiled at me with a brilliantly charming smile. I couldn't help myself from blushing at the sight._

_"It's alright! I'll just go change before heading to club activities," Haruhi said as he/she dashed off towards the restroom. As I looked after her, I saw her running into the women's bathroom and I started to get a bit suspicious, if not curious. I followed her/him. Though I felt it was very wrong, I peered into the bathroom, but I saw no sign of Fujioka-san. Walking in deeper, though against my better judgment, I peered into a half open stall, only to see Fujioka-san in the middle of changing. She hadn't noticed me yet, but my hand somehow found its way to my camera and instantly began to snap away, the first flash surprising Fujioka-san, making her turn around to see what it was._

_I could swear that instantly, my face began to turn red as the only clothing she wore was a pair of the boy's uniform pants._

_END OF FLASHBACK_

"At that point, I instantly made a dash for it, not really caring who I passed." The boy had finished his story, but he was still unaware of the incredibly evil glares emanating from the host club in front of him. Haruhi put her pointer finger to her chin, thinking it over.

"Ah! That did happen!" Haruha announced, causing everyone in the host club to look at her.

"Haruhi! Why didn't you close the bathroom stall?! And why did you enter the female bathroom?!" Tamaki cried out in despair, capturing Haruhi into the third hug that afternoon, letting a small sound come from her.

"I can't go inside the men's bathroom! And I didn't close the stall because I decided it wouldn't matter since I change fast anyway," Haruhi answered, shrugging as much she could in the Host Club King's arms. Hikaru and Kaoru were glaring menacingly at the boy with the camera, Hikaru tempted to beat the crap out of the kid with a baseball bat. The boy noticed this and instantly tried to run, but to no avail as Kaoru had already latched onto the back of boy's uniform.

"Here's the pervert! There's only one thing we can do now!" Kaoru announced, giving off as evil an aura as his brother. They both nodded as Kaoru held on tight, much to the dismay of the victim. Before him, Hikaru had the bat in a swinging position that looked ready to send him to the galaxy.

"That's right! We need to beat the memories out of this guy!" The bat was threatening to swing at any moment as the boy dropped the camera and blocked his face. They had all temporarily forgotten that they had an audience. AKA, the whole student body.

"Hey, wait a minute!" Haruhi called, causing the two twins to look at her, Hikaru putting the bat away for a moment.

"Haruhi! How can you let this guy go around telling everyone?" Hikaru demanded of her, both of them standing at attention in front of her.

"It doesn't really matter. They were all bound to find out eventually, seeing as though you guys crossdress me so much," Haruhi pointed out, looking at the twins with an all-knowing face. They all turned to attention as they noticed Kyoya picking up the camera that had fallen out of the boy's hands.

"Hey, that's—"

"Now property of the Host Club," Kyoya shot the boy a menacing glance, shutting him up instantly. Turning the camera on, the rest of the club decided to look at the pictures inside, just to check. Yeah, right.

"Who're the perverts now?" Haruhi asked, looking at them all accusingly, but they paid her no mind. Instantly, the camera pictures were being flipped through. Everyone, as in everyone, noticed that after the first two seconds of flipping, the camera had been promptly shut off by a silent host club, their king already having been sprawled on the ground after turning completely red and letting blood slowly drip from his nose. The twins had joined him, while the other three were just completely silent. Haruhi just looked at them, staring at their positions as she just heaved a great big sigh.

"We wanna see the pictures!" Some people from the long forgotten crowd yelled, mostly around the boy's section of the large crowd, as the rest of the student body went into an uproar. Haruhi twitched at all the pushing people who were trying to get past Mori and Hunny.

"Oh my! Then this whole time, Haruhi-kun was actually a girl in disguise?!" Several of the fangrils screamed as they all nearly shrieked "MOE!!" at all the moments they remembered that Haruhi had been involved in. After getting over the initial shock, Kyoya came over and put a hand on Haruhi's shoulder.

"…Haruhi, your pictures will serve as good merchandise and pay off the rest of your debt." Haruhi twitched even more. Now her pictures were for merchandise? Privacy was no longer a word. Heaving another great sigh, Haruhi seated herself in a chair and sat there, thinking over what she would do since she was no longer in the host club. Wouldn't that mean she was to wear the girl uniform from now on? Suddenly, a shrill cry from the crowd broke her out of her thoughts as something she thought she would never hear echoed through the room.

"KYAAAH!! Haruhi-chan has a male harem!" Everybody in the club froze as more cries of excitement rose through the building. Soon, Haruhi was more or less being attacked by the entire school, asking her about her activities and what the host club did knowing she was a girl. Tamaki and the twins, noticing her position in the sea of students, quickly went to her rescue as Mori left his bodyguard duty and lifted Haruhi off the ground.

"Ah, Mori-senpai!" Haruhi cried as Mori just stepped out of the crowd that was now attacking him.

"Operation Save Haruhi Complete! Tono!" The twins called to their leader as Tamaki nodded. The entire host club dashed out of the room, taking quick refuge into an empty room at the back of the music room. As Haruhi was put down, she started to gulp in large amounts of air.

"What was that for?!" Haruhi almost yelled, if not for everyone shushing her. Everybody had surrounded Haruhi as she just looked at them, angry yet confused.

"Haruhi, you're in big trouble!" Kaoru whispered harshly.

"Why?"

"Because now that everyone thinks we're your –shiver—_male harem_, nobody'll leave you alone!" Hikaru pointed out to the oblivious girl as everyone nodded. Haruhi thought of what might happen, shivering at the very thought of having the host club as her male harem.

"So, how am I supposed to go to school now? If nobody will leave me alone, then how do I get anywhere?" Haruhi whispered harshly back at them, which got them all into thinking mode. Suddenly, Kyoya snapped shut his notebook, though nobody knows when he had opened it in the first place.

"Perhaps, it would profit for the host club if we were to pretend and be her male harem. It will please the customers as well as bring us a large profit from any merchandise we happen to make out of it," Kyoya suggested as Haruhi just heaved a sigh. The Shadow King worked for merits, that was that. Suddenly, the devilish twins glanced at each other, an evil idea seemingly flashing between them.

"Tono! You wanna play a game?" Kaoru announced to the leader of their club.

"Yeah, it's called the "Whoever-gets-the-most-fans" game! We all pretend to be her male harem and whichever pair, or triple, gets the most fans wins the pictures inside of that camera!" Hikaru suggested evilly as they almost all stared wide-eyed at him.

"No! I will not expose my daughter to the likes of the general public like that!" Tamaki explained as he swung his arms around Haruhi possessively. Haruhi was too shocked to care anymore.

"Are you quitting then? I'm sure we'd love to share our love with Haruhi, right Hikaru?" Kaoru asked his brother mischievously, but the reaction was slightly different than normal.

"Y-yeah…" everybody caught the stutter, but decided to put it off. Tamaki, who realized it right away, decided it best to win the competition anyway, just so they couldn't threaten him with the photos.

"Fine! I'll take on your challenge! And as King, everybody has to participate!" Tamaki announced quietly, which woke everybody up. Haruhi heaved a long sigh again that day as the door to the music room was pushed open.

Let the games begin.

**Eh, originally, I was going to have Tamaki accidentally blurt it out during lunch and have everybody hear it, but I decided not to. I think I made them slightly OOC, except for Mori. He didn't say anything, so he's okay I guess. The pairing in the end is a secret. Just don't think that majority vote will mean much, since it IS a surprise. I just kind of wrote this to get it off my mind.**


	2. Chapter 2

**I feel horrible, so don't worry if I seem a bit odder than usual. Anyway, the last few days were used for the replacing of my room's floor. It went from carpet to wood, but the most drastic change would probably be that somehow, my room feels a lot emptier. TOO empty, even. The bad part about the change: there are little scraps of wood in my room that won't go away and they keep giving me splinters. That's part of the reason why I feel horrible, but I'm sure you all don't want to hear me rant about why I'm in a bad mood, right?**

The semi-unexpected happened once the back room doors opened: The crowd that had been slightly under control earlier was now completely out of control and were attacking them all the moment they set foot outside of the back room. Mori and Hunny had to keep them back just so the host club could sneak away in an attempt for escape. While sneaking past the crowd, one girl was quick enough to catch Haruhi by the back of her blazer, keeping her from moving any further. Struggling with the hand that had a hold of her, she stripped out of the blazer and made a dash for the door as quickly as she could go. Before she made it past the door, seeing as she was the last one out, she heard a squeal in the crowd that was along the lines of "I got Haruhi's blazer! KYAAAH!" or something like that. The last sight Haruhi saw was probably her blazer being torn into a million pieces by the rabid student body.

Letting out a sigh of relief, she shivered at the cold chill that went through the hallway. Rubbing her arms, she looked at the door that concealed the crazy fans. They would've busted through had the twins, Mori, and Hunny not barricaded it with their bodies, trying their best to keep them from bursting the door into pieces and attacking them. Tamaki took a piece of spare wood from out of nowhere and locked the door, allowing everyone to heave a sigh.

"Haruhi!" Hikaru said in almost a whiny tone. Haruhi just let out another sigh. Who knew it would cause such trouble just because she was a girl?

"Look at what happened! You should've told them you weren't a girl!" Kaoru pointed out, trying to keep his brother's anger in check.

"They would've found out from the camera anyway! Did you guys really want my picture circulating the entire school?!" Haruhi pointed out, thinking of how much better she would feel once she got home. At least there she wouldn't have to deal with a bunch of rich kids trying to attack her until she was no more.

"I have a plan to protect my dear daughter!" Tamaki suddenly exclaimed from his seat, posing to emphasize.

"Does it have anything to do with going back into the music room?"Kyoya called from his spot, pushing his glasses up as he wrote something into his black notebook. From the look that he predicted was on Tamaki's face, he knew he was right. Knowing this, Tamaki was probably making a new plan on the spot.

"…I have another plan!" Bingo.

"Forget the plan! I feel like going home now," Haruhi said, obviously not wanting to be at school any longer. Tamaki faulted, though he tried to stay away from his corner.

"But-but Haruhi! Daddy doesn't want you to be attacked by students everyday!" Tamaki tried, but was met with utter disappointment.

"I don't care! I just want to go home!" Haruhi whined, flicking the blonde off. Tamaki whimpered and sat in his little corner of despair, growing mushrooms and tearing pieces of paper for his little hamster cage. Sighing, Haruhi just plopped herself down, hoping that this nightmare would end. Haruhi picked up and started walking down the hallway towards the entrance to the school, hoping to make it home in time for the special at the supermarket. As she walked past a small pile of mushrooms and paper, she noticed a certain idiot missing.

"Huh? Where's Tamaki-senpai?" Haruhi asked, looking to the other host club members for answers.

"Ah, he ran off towards the superintendent's office," Kyoya said, writing yet another note inside of his notebook. What goes on in that notebook is a mystery and will remain a mystery. The host club thought for a moment before freezing up.

"EH?!" They made a mad dash for the superintendent's office, only to get there too late. Peering in through the open door, they saw Tamaki taking a key, possibly to the school, from his father, all smiles and grins. His father looked busy with some paperwork and several phone calls, so it was a wonder if he even knew why he was giving his son the key to the school. Tamaki, who was like a little happy puppy, made a mad dash towards the school entrance, ignoring the host club completely. They tried to run after him, but were too late as Tamaki snapped the key into the lock hole and turned, locking the school from the inside.

"Tamaki-senpai!" Haruhi called, getting his attention before he could do anything more.

"Haruhi!" Tamaki called happily, preparing to run over to them. Once his foot touched the floor, it met with a banana peel and he slipped, the key flying out of his hands and currently becoming airborne. The host club scrambled to get the key, the only means of their escape other than jumping from a window on the second floor. Yeah, like they would really do that. Only Nekozawa would do that, and it was for his little sister. As the key sailed over their heads, Mori reached up and clutched the key in his fist, raising a cheer from several host members. Mori smiled a tiny smile, but it was soon gone once he, too, stepped on a banana peel and slipped, the key once again in the air.

"We got it!" The twins shouted, but they accidentally collided with Hunny, who was running in the same direction as them. They all fell down, the key falling faster and faster out of their clutches. Haruhi ran after the key, jumping to the floor and reaching as far as she could towards the key as she slid on the floor, gliding across the smooth marble. As she saw the key coming towards her hand, she almost smiled.

"I've got it!" Haruhi called, seemingly in slow motion, as the key was still very high in the sky and she was quickly gaining speed. Suddenly, her sliding stopped as her head met with a pair of very shiny shoes. Rubbing her head, she looked up and met eyes with Kyoya, who had the key safely between his fingers. Everyone stood up as Kyoya flashed the key in his hand before walking to the door and sticking the key into the lock.

"No!" Tamaki suddenly shouted, slamming into Kyoya's back and pushing him a little too hard into the door, causing the key to slice right through the key hole. Everything seemed to go in slow motion as the key suddenly began to break, chipping into small fragments as Kyoya met with the door and Tamaki met the floor. The rest of the host club watched the chain of events in awe, none able to move to stop it. Once Tamaki had collided with the floor, everyone was finally able to start moving again.

"Tono! Kyoya-senpai!" Kaoru called as his brother followed him, both inspecting the two victims to this accident. Kyoya had staggered backwards, holding his stomach in pain as the key fell to the floor, breaking into two pieces that were both much too small to use anymore. Tamaki, who was in Lala-land on the floor, looked about ready to puke his guts out.

"The key is no longer useable, which means we have no means of escape. Unless, of course, one of us is willing to jump out the window from the second floor," Kyoya pointed out, still clutching his stomach. Everyone noticed this and checked it out right away.

"Ah, Kyoya-senpai! You're bleeding!" Haruhi said as the blood on his hands started dripping to the floor. Apparently, the key not only went through the key hole, but pierced through his skin as well.

"Wah! It looks really painful, Kyou-chan!" Hunny nearly cried, holding onto his rabbit extra hard, suffocating the poor bunny. Kyoya, who was gasping rather hard, decided it best not to speak, as it would waste his breath. Nothing was going to come out of killing himself faster, now would it? Falling to the floor and leaning against a wall for support, Kyoya just gave way. Tamaki, who was still unconscious off to the side, woke up, though his vision was blurry and he felt blind. Staggering, he stood and walked, though he looked like a drunk idiot.

"Ah, Tono woke up!" Hikaru informed, everybody looking towards their host king. The twins rushed over to their king, Haruhi and Hunny staying with Kyoya.

"Hold still for a minute, Kyoya-senpai," Haruhi instructed, feeling a bit strange bossing around the Shadow King. He didn't respond, but he tried to sit still. He looked over from his glasses, which had tipped off of his nose, and saw Haruhi wrapping his stomach with some bandages, from where she got the bandages was beyond him, and stopping the bleeding.

"Wow, Haru-chan's just like a nurse! Right Takashi?" Hunny called from watching Haruhi heal the vice-president.

"Yeah," Mori answered in his own talkative way. Kyoya's breathing evened out and soon, he was breathing normally. Haruhi was about to finish wrapping when a giggle could be heard from down the 

hallway. The host club stopped what they were doing and looked towards the sound, noticing several girls and a few boys watching them, giggling and blushing. After staring at them for awhile, realization hit them. The students had found a way out! Rushing, they scrambled everywhere, wondering what to do. They couldn't run because Kyoya was injured, and they couldn't hide because they were in an open hallway with no doors close by. Panicking for a moment, they decided to just sit still, almost believing that if they did, the students would go away. Too bad students weren't like bees. The just walked towards them, calmly, even though they were still giggling.

"What do we do, Tono?" The twins whispered to their king, who was sweating bullets as he tried to think, though he failed horribly.

"Relax! They'll leave eventually, then we can hide! But we must protect our dear Haruhi at all costs!" Tamaki whispered back to the twins, who nodded and proceeded to slowly make their way towards Haruhi, trying to not seem suspicious. Haruhi just inwardly groaned at their attempt to shoo away the other students, but went right back to helping the injured member. Biting the last strip of bandage, Haruhi securely wrapped the bandages and wiped sweat off of her forehead.

"There! All done, Kyoya-senpai! Do you feel better?" Haruhi asked, helping him button his shirt.

"Yes, thank you," Kyoya answered briefly, moving himself into a sitting position. "However, we still have the locked door problem. I cannot contact anybody from my mansion because they are all on a business trip in Brazil."

"That is a problem…," Haruhi said, thinking of a way out of the school. If not, they would be stuck in for quite awhile. And then, her father would think something happened, and the chain of events afterwards didn't look pretty. Sighing, Haruhi just leaned back against the marble floor, wincing as the cold marble touched her skin through the thin shirt that was supposed to be covered by her lost blazer. Shivering, she completely forgot about the students that were advancing on them. Looking up from her spot, she noticed that they were gone. Breathing a sigh of relief, she leaned back again, wincing once more and rubbing her arms for warmth. Suddenly, a large jacket was thrown at her, instantly warming her. Peering over the collar of the blazer, she noticed that Kyoya had thrown the jacket.

"As thanks for helping me. We are even now," was his response, and Haruhi just smiled before wrapping the jacket around herself and walking towards everyone else. The dilemma before them wasn't an easy one to crack. Haruhi was sure that the key Tamaki was given was definitely the only one, so it wouldn't help to just go ask for another one. Having Hunny and Mori destroy the door, especially if it were her idea, would just add to her debt as well as anger the superintendent for destroying his expensive double doors. She was pretty sure that there weren't any locksmiths in the school at the moment and getting excessive force on the door would be the same as knocking it down. Then, suddenly, a though hit her. A bobby pin! If she had one, she might be able to unlock the door!

"I just had an idea!" Haruhi announced as everyone looked at her, awaiting her speech.

"What is it, my daughter? Have you found a way out?!" Tamaki scrambled, hoping she would say yes. Much to his glee, she did, but everything must come with a catch.

"Yeah, but that involves us getting close to the student body, preferably the females."

"Why's that, Haru-chan?" Hunny almost whined.

"Because I think at least one of them has to have a bobby pin. If we can get our hands on one, then I can try to unlock the door," Haruhi finished, though the looks on their faces wasn't really helping.

"A bobby pin? What's that?" Hikaru asked his brother, who just shugged. Haruhi popped a vein, but tried to bear with it, seeing as though they were the only way she was getting out of this school. At least, the only way that didn't involve jumping from a window.

"It doesn't matter! This commoner's way of unlocking doors will help us escape the school! We must not underestimate the commoner's thinking!" Tamaki announced, the twins and Hunny agreeing with him as Haruhi tried not to blow up in their faces. The club proceeded in walking towards the Third Music Room, the place where they knew the student body would still be, awaiting their return. Once they were in front of the door, they all took a deep breath before turning the knob and pushing open the door.

**Scoreboard so far: Tamaki: 0 Hikaru: 0 Kaoru: 0 Hunny: 0 Mori: 0 Kyoya: 1**

**Yep, I've added a scoreboard, just because it seemed fun to do. So far, Kyoya is winning, but this is only the beginning. Anyway, I almost didn't know how to write this chapter, but since it's up now, I won't have to worry about it anymore.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Okay, this is the third installment so far. Ah, just so everyone knows, votes from reviews do count for something. If you read that little author's note at the very end of chapter two and noticed the scoreboard, then good for you. However, that scoreboard is for in story occurrences. On the flip side, I will be adding another scoreboard under it that will count up all the votes. Then, at the end, I'll compare both charts and the winner will be decided. So vote away if you want, at least knowing that they count for something.**

The screaming fans and crazy student body never came once the door to the former Host Club's headquarters had been opened. Though very grateful, the club kept its guard up as the seven of them took a few steps into the room. Giggling could be heard as all seven pairs of eyes turned to the entire student body, which was currently crowding around something or somebody. Curiosity probably filling them, the host club decided it best to find out what they were looking at and fast. Mori, the tallest in the club and probably the entire school, lifted Haruhi onto his shoulders and allowed her a peek at the middle of attention. Though a completely harmless action between the two club members, a small few students giggled at it before quickly turning their attention away.

"Haruhi! What do you see?" Kaoru called quietly from the ground as Haruhi continued to survey the area. Finally catching a glimpse of what everyone was looking at, it turned out to be a huge discussion instead.

"Um, it looks like they're arguing over something," Haruhi called back down just as quietly, but no matter how quiet they called, every student could still hear them. All heads were on the club now and they weren't liking the attention they were receiving. Before anything could start, Haruhi decided to ask her long awaited question.

"What are you guys arguing about?" That confused look was on her face and several students almost blushed at how cute they thought it looked.

"They're arguing on which couple would be the best," a voice called from the back of the crowd. The host club looked at the student, who happened to be Class 1-A's president, Kazukiyo Souga.

"Ah, Class Rep!" The twins and Haruhi chorused in unison as Mori had already let the girl down from his shoulders. The class president looked at them as the crowd decided to turn its attention back to the discussion at hand.

"I'm surprised, Fujioka. I never really suspected you to be a girl," Kazukiyo admitted, his face slightly flustered.

"Well, honestly nobody did. Everyone just thought that I looked like a girl," Haruhi said and giggled a bit remembering back on all the moments she had almost been caught.

"Oh, Class Rep! Since you're here, why don't you tell us?" The twins said simultaneously, curious looks on their faces. Kazukiyo looked a bit frightened of them, but that's different.

"Er, what do you mean?"

"Who do you think Haruhi should be with, of course!" They chorused as their trademark grins spread on their faces with a flourish. The president was now even more afraid of the looks on their faces, but tried to seriously think the question over.

"If I had to be honest, I wouldn't know. I've never actually seen Fujioka with anyone other than you two, so I can't really vote. Although, Kuragano-san has been telling me about her thoughts on it before this whole fiasco came up."

"What did she say?!" Tamaki suddenly jumped at the president, eager to know what the class vice-president thought. Kazukiyo almost shook as he stared at his upperclassman, who was so scarily holding the young student by the scruff of his shirt collar.

"S-she said t-that Fu-Fujioka looked the b-best with Kyoya-senpai!" Kazukiyo spluttered out, catching his breath when Tamaki's grip loosened several notches. Kyoya seemed to smirk in the background as Haruhi just looked at her class president in disbelief. Tamaki's eyes widened as he suddenly began to cry fake tears.

"Oh, my poor daughter! These fair maidens do not understand that a father should ALWAYS be paired with his daughter!" Tamaki continued to sob as he clutched tightly onto the very suspecting Haruhi. Groaning at her predicament, Haruhi just let out a sigh as she didn't even try to struggle out of his grasp. Kazukiyo just kind of stared at the so called 'family' in interest as he watched. Just then, the twins towered over him, their faces showed no emotion and were as passive as Mori's face, just much darker.

"So, why did she pick Kyoya-senpai?" Kaoru asked darkly, giving a very scary looking eye towards the class president. By now, Kazukiyo was shivering in his shoes.

"Yes, please do tell why she picked him and not us," Hikaru said just as darkly as he imitated his twin brother, which got the class president screaming for his life as he tried to run away. The twins had caught the back of his shirt, making escape impossible. After running out of breath, Kazukiyo had no choice but to give up. By far, he wasn't quite happy with the fact that he had been screaming his head off and the crowd right next to them had yet to notice anything.

"So will you tell us?" Came the usual chime of the Hitachiin twins as they eyed their president like two hawks.

"She said that they seem to be really close because she's noticed how they're always together, even if it's like background scenery. She said it was 'cute' whenever Fujioka went to Kyoya-senpai for help and that, after hearing about some sort of debt, Kyoya-senpai continuously raised her debt just to make her stay in the club," Kazukiyo informed them as he allowed the formidable silence afterwards to allow the information to seep into their brains. The silence continued and when Haruhi was about to answer any unwanted questions, the argument from the crowd had gotten louder.

"I say it should most definitely be Tamaki-sama!"

"No! Hikaru!"

"You're both wrong! It should be both twins!"

"Oh my gosh, that would be so hot!"

"Nuh uh! That's sick! I say it should be Mori-senpai!"

"Back it up, everyone! It should be Kyouya!" The blurb of conversation got increasingly louder until the entire school could hear it. Haruhi, who was too shocked for words to even show how she was feeling, slumped to the floor and let her soul drift off. The host club and Kazukiyo watched her soul drift off as it hit the ceiling and just hovered right there. When her body seemed to find her soul once more, she decided to stop the conversation once and for all. Running through the crowd, surprising several students she passed, she held her hands up to keep all sides from attacking each other.

"Everyone, BE QUIET!" The students all stopped talking at once as Haruhi put her arms down and let out a sigh. Her deep breaths stopped as she stood up once more from her slouched position.

"Haruhi, what do you suggest we do now? We do have a mission to accomplish," Kyoya reminded her as he jotted more notes down in his mysterious black notebook. Haruhi took time to get her composure back.

"Well, I'm not quite sure, but this arguing is really driving me up the wall. What's up with this anyway? What does it matter that I'm a girl surrounded by a host club of guys?" Shocked gasps came from the masses as the host club gaped at her.

"Haruhi, you really don't know?!" Kaoru exclaimed, dramatically posing to make it seem a bit more than it really was.

"I'm quite sure I don't." came the plain reply.

"Poor Haruhi. What does it matter? It matters a lot!" Hikaru butted in. By now both twins were surrounding her, leaning onto either of her shoulders.

"You're a girl surrounded by six rich, good-looking guys and you think it doesn't matter?!" The twins asked in unison as the masses whole-heartedly agreed. Haruhi just shrugged. It didn't seem much different to her. Several people almost died at her obliviousness.

"All these matters aside, what are the facts backing up all of these claims?" Haruhi really wanted to know what the students were using as evidence for any of their claims. It seemed as though everyone was just really biased.

"This!" A girl from the crowd shouted as she bounded to the front, revealing a DVD box set for Ouran High School Host Club. The host club, except Mori and Kyoya, gaped as she opened the box to reveal CDs. Popping one into the DVD players that seemed to appear from nowhere, the screen began to play some sort of introduction song. Though that blow wasn't hard enough to send them all 

speechless, the next part did. It showed the events that happened on the first day Haruhi came to Ouran Academy.

"Ohohohohoho!" A high powered motor went off somewhere and from the ground came Renge as her platform went in slow circles until it had reached the peak of its height. One had to wonder how she never got dizzy of spinning so much.

"Egh, otaku alert!" The twins urged together as they looked at Renge in horror.

"My instincts were tingling the moment I discovered that my dear Haruhi-kun was actually a girl! But when I discovered how it has been since the beginning, I could not help all the moe! I instantly purchased the Ouran High School Host Club DVD box set and watched the entire thing in a whole night! It was just so MOE!!"

"KYAAAH!!" went the screams of all the girls in the school.

"Oh? It seems our adventures as a host club have been caught in video format without our knowing. Would it be too much trouble to ask that we watch these videos in the case that we must shut down whatever company created them?" Kyoya had made it sound undeniably pleasant, but the true reality of the matter was that pure evil and dastardly planning had been put behind each word. The host club shivered from the coldness that was emanating from what seemed to be Kyoya's soul at the moment.

"Of course, Kyoya-sama!" Renge, ever so faithful, did not sense one bit of the evil coming from the Shadow King as CD after CD was inserted into the DVD player. All the watching seemed to hurt the host clubs' eyes, but it didn't seem to have any effect on any of the other students. The first CD had episodes one through five in high quality, along with added commentary in the form of a document from the maker of these DVDs. It turns out, the creator was a female who had an obsessive complex for the Host Club and Haruhi. Nobody would have expected less. Episode one had gone by fairly easily, though the ending was a bit much on everyone's poor soul. Er, scratch that, on poor Tamaki's soul.

"See, Tamaki and Haruhi are the best! It even shows so in the very first episode!" A random person shot from the crowd. Tamaki, who was lost on whatever the student said, just turned pale white and floated there. People stared at his white empty shell as his little ghost floated freely in the air. Haruhi just sighed.

"You know, if this is going to happen every single episode, I think it'd be better if Tamaki-senpai didn't watch at all." Instantly, the said blonde's soul flew right back into his body as he regained consciousness.

"But-but Haruhi! I need to know! This could be good Father-Daughter bonding time! You bond with your brothers too much for Daddy's liking!" Tamaki ranted, branching off into an entire new conversation where he spoke about how it was unfair that the twins were allowed to sit near Haruhi and how they always got to see her in class everyday.

"Tamaki-senpai, the twins are still here. Technically, that means I'm bonding with everyone right now."

"But—!"

"No buts! If you can't take watching these DVDs, then don't watch them," Haruhi said in an exasperated tone. Tamaki just fake cried a little and nodded, his puppy eyes staring at her adoringly, though to no avail. The girls went wild over it though. A few people just ignored them and moved on to episode 2. That episode went over well, as not much had really happened. The worst part was probably the kiss, but everyone knew about that already. Tamaki almost sighed in relief at that, causing Haruhi to groan. Episode three, however, was a different matter completely. The episode on Physical Examination Day had hit everyone pretty hard.

"This is going to be a long day…," Haruhi mumbled as several students in the crowd awaited eagerly in their seats for the episode to start.

**Scoreboard(From the story): Tamaki: 2 Hikaru: 0 Kaoru: 0 Hunny: 0 Mori: 1 Kyoya: 2**

**Scoreboard(From Reviews) Tamaki: 1 Hikaru: 0 Kaoru: 0 Hunny: 0 Mori: 0 Kyoya: 2**

"I WILL win this in the end for only a father should be with his daughter!"

"Oh? But from the scoreboards, everyone would rather vote for me instead."

"Hey, how come we don't get any votes?!"

"Takashi! We should go get some cake!"

"Yeah."

**Okay, the dialogue after the scoreboard was put in for fun. Now, as far as I know, NOBODY has used this idea before, even though I found it somewhat glaringly obvious. No offense though because none was intended in the first place. To start with, in the anime for Ouran, Renge cosplays and watches a lot of anime and manga and Kyoya even mentions the name of an existing manga made by the same manga artist as Ouran, Millennium Snow. So, I always wonder, why has it never occurred to anyone that eventually, they would find their own anime or manga? I had that idea awhile ago and decided to intermix it within this story. Also, Tamaki got two points because of that ending scene in the first episode(of the anime) and from his puppy dog eyes. If you would all like to refresh yourselves by re-watching these episodes as I go along, please feel free to. Also, somehow, I get the feeling nobody's going to vote for Hunny. Heck, I wouldn't even for him because we probably all know that they'll just stay friends anyway. Okay, enough of this, I'm ranting. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter!**

**Current winner thus far: Kyoya (So for all you KyoyaxHaruhi fans out there, cheer if you want.)**

**A little side note: It IS true that in a few episodes, you can see that Kyoya and Haruhi are next to each other a lot. Examples would be Episode 11 and Episode 22. **


	4. Chapter 4

**Alright, I've decided, with a lot of pressure from my friends, that I will do this one update before the start of the school year. I also hear from a reviewer, the name to which I will not give, that they want to see the reaction from episode 8. Sadly, that is not in this chapter, but rather the next one. Unless, of course, halfway through I start to feel like extending the chapter. In that case, episode 8 will be included. Enjoy, and vote!**

Haruhi's life had just blown into a million pieces. Why? Well, the first disaster in her life was her mother's death, bless her poor dead soul, which was a very big happening in her life. The second disaster was going to Ouran Academy, the school that was full of rich kids who just liked to pick on her because she was poor. The third disaster: Meeting and being forced to join the Ouran High School Host Club because she broke an eight million yen vase. Not only that, but the host club just stretched her imagination of how much worse a bunch of rich kids could really make fun of her, namely through trying out the traditions of "the commoners". And finally, disaster four, the worst out of everything. Her life had been videotaped, against her will and including even her most embarrassing scenes, and turned into a DVD for the general public to enjoy. If her life didn't suck, then I guess the world must be one hell of a cruel place. At the moment, the student body and the host club were taking a break after watching episodes one and two of her life at Ouran and frankly, it was still a shock to the host club.

"Ah well, it doesn't get much crazier than this. Where did that projector and DVD player come from anyway? Isn't this a music room?" Haruhi told herself as she sat off to the side in an empty couch. It felt so fluffy and comfortable, like a cloud she decided. She was so lost in being comfortable on the "cloud", she almost didn't hear someone calling her name.

"Haruhi! We're continuing the DVD now!" Hikaru called as Haruhi lazily pulled herself away from the couch and trudged over to the huge projector. The third episode started with the opening theme and the normal cosplay in the host club. This time around, it was a cherry blossom viewing banquet. The club was doing its usual activities, much to the audience's great pleasure. The episode continued along as well as the others, smoothly and without much fault other than the occasional whining from Tamaki. Then the phrase "fall for me yet?" came from video Tamaki's mouth and the crowd watched in anticipation, even though it was stated before that they had already seen the entire series, for Haruhi's answer. Of course, the answer was always no, or she would be exasperated by something else.

"What's that kite that keeps appearing for?" Haruhi asked out of the blue, surprising the people watching next to her.

"We have no idea, but apparently it symbolizes something later," the student answered back, shrugging at the prospect. As the video continued, others could not help but laugh at Tamaki's demise in the video when the twins had so evidently teased him by mentioning to him that they were in the same class as Haruhi. Points were flying all around as the crowd decided on who to vote for. The sparkly scene with the twins and Haruhi persuaded some, but the "Father-Mother" scene between Tamaki and Kyoya got a new pairing up. Apparently, they were all open for ideas.

"Ah, Tono! It still hurt from that time you called us unscrupulous," Kaoru pointed out when the video Tamaki had called them unscrupulous. The girls squealed at all the funny-art moments and how 

cute they looked on screen. Apparently, that counts as points all around. And none of them could really suppress a squeal when the screen decided to show topless Kyoya and Tamaki look alikes for examples of the physical examination. At this point, Kyoya's notebook was probably filled with several pages on that one episode alone. That brings up the wonder of whether his notebook ever runs out of pages. But that's a different story altogether. The crowd was probably going wild again once Tamaki's "fantasy" started up.

"Tamaki-senpai…you weren't actually thinking that I would say that, were you?" Tamaki was hiding from the wrath of the third demon among them. However, it was interrupted when several cries of disagreement were shot out at the other host club members being "homo side characters". Even Haruhi had to crack a smile at that.

"Well, we got revenge for being called 'homo characters'," the twins chimed, which got Tamaki to remember all about it.

"You…you devilish twins! You told me it would work!" Tamaki cried as the crowd just marveled the screen. The twins just snickered at him, pointing and laughing at him. The crowd behind them had recently decided to add their points to Tamaki, just because he was holding Haruhi so close and had called her the club's very own "princess". However, the twins got points as well for just mentioning that they would be pissed if other guys talked to Haruhi. Everyone almost broke out in laughter at Haruhi's un-cooperative attitude towards the plan. Everyone had to break out in laughter once the Ootoro was mentioned. As rich kids, they probably at the stuff every day, so it was a huge hit to them when all it took was Ootoro to get Haruhi motivated.

"Geez, this is a horrible first impression in a rich society, isn't it?" Haruhi huffed to herself. She couldn't help herself from thinking they were all just a bunch of rich bastards every day. Then again, thinking that was going to get her nowhere. Every girl squealed when the screen moved across the host club's faces, which were all smiling, and made them all want to shout, but the part afterwards with Haruhi was the last straw.

"OH MY GOD, MOE!!"

"I'm going to go deaf one of these days," Haruhi mumbled to herself, recalling all events afterwards.

"Haruhi, you didn't think that it was like a regular physical examination?" Hikaru asked, looking at her expression on the screen when they first entered the examination room. Her face practically screamed "Are you kidding me?" at Hikaru's as he decided to withdraw his question. And although the females were there during the actual physical examination, they couldn't help but squeal, AGAIN, when the Hitachiin brothers did their physicals. Points were all flying towards Tamaki the moment Haruhi had fallen into the curtains and Tamaki had grabbed her. Though everything afterwards was quite hilarious, the student body was particularly surprised that the so called "imposter doctor" had gone into the examination room that Haruhi was in. The reaction from the host club was rather funny though.

Though the situation was dire, the entire boy population was drooling when Haruhi was about to do her examination. Tamaki had already jumped out in front of the screen, though his body covered only a small fraction. However, the twins, Hunny, and that means Mori too, jumped at the screen as well.

"No! I will not allow my daughter to be seen in such a way in public! NEVER!" As Tamaki made a huge scene out of it, Haruhi decided to blow it back in his face.

"But they've all already seen the entire DVD box collection, so wouldn't they have seen it already?" The corner of woe was already occupied by the blonde as he silently wept his fake tears.

"…Daddy was just trying to help…" Haruhi just sighed. Though, that didn't mean that nobody went wild when the host club appeared and "left their mark" with a short(long) introduction of who they were to the fake doctor. They all found it odd when the guy suddenly started telling his life story, though. Everybody had to go "awww" when Haruhi made her speech about staying in the host club, though. But, it all turned into laughter as the screen panned into the sky and the ending theme appeared.

"And somehow, I regret ever doing that now," Haruhi admitted, though it was only half true.

"Haruhi! Are you still mad at Daddy for that?!"

"No. Can we just go to the next episode please?"

Episode four turned out to be the welcoming of Renge's character. The episode was fairly Renge-Haruhi centric, so interest was yet to be piqued. Apparently, though, the boy population decided that it would be great to have a girl-girl pairing in the mix. So yet another pairing was born as points began to fly about the room once more, at some point towards one pairing and at another point to another pairing. To the victim of it all, it was total hell. Episode five was complete Haruhi and the twins heaven. Several votes were thrown towards the three way triple as the twins held up the victory signs for their obvious win. Episode five was probably dedicated to them anyway, so a few extra points wouldn't matter. Hikaru got points for trying to feed Haruhi, Kaoru got points towards the pairing of his brother and himself when he ate the food instead. Both twins got votes near the end and at the beginning of the episode. Tamaki got a few points as well for being added into the mix Renge pointed out near the middle.

"It's true, though. Haruhi is the first one to tell us apart," Kaoru pointed out to the crowd before them. Apparently, it was a miracle anybody could tell them apart.

"And she's only known us for less than a year?" Hikaru interjected, looking at his brother.

"That's amazing," they said in unison as they looked at Haruhi, who was still a bit confused on the whole thing.

"It really isn't that hard. If someone were to take a moment to observe, they could obviously see the difference," Haruhi argued, pushing them off of her. She desperately wanted to go home now, almost instantly remembering their original mission. She was about to ask for a bobby pin when the large crowd began to argue over something again, their voices and volume level overpowering that of poor Haruhi.

"I'll just ask later." It was break time once more and the next CD was going to have episodes six through ten. Haruhi sighed, the afternoon hadn't even started yet and she already wanted to run home and hide herself for the next few weeks. These rich kids were driving her absolutely nuts. Up the wall she told herself, right up that wall. One day, she would probably run right into it. And then where would she be? Sighing to herself, she plopped right down and decided to take a nap, but it was so rudely—not really—interrupted by the Shadow King himself.

"Yes, Kyoya-senpai? Did you need something?"

"Not enjoying yourself, Haruhi?"

"Not really. I'm the victim of some person who likes to stalk me and personally make my life into a DVD series. Yeah, I really should be enjoying myself." Mock sarcasm mixed into her words. A smirk appeared on his face, his black notebook having written down everything she just said.

"A very interesting point of view. Though, your life seems to reflect greatly on the masses. They rather enjoy the ordeal you are in. I myself am quite enjoying in how your life fares while you are in this club. It is rather…entertaining, if I do say so myself."

"Oh? An Ootori interested in the life of a poor commoner such as myself? Wow, what an honor." The sarcasm practically dripped from her mouth as a mock smile appeared on her companion's.

"Though Ootoris do not interest themselves in such, I find you to be quite an interesting person." He walked away, a smile Haruhi had seen only twice before plastered on his face. It still puzzled her on what it meant though. Haruhi did not have time to think about it as someone called her back over for the next episodes to start.

**Scoreboard(in story): Tamaki: 6 Hikaru: 2 Kaoru: 2 Hunny: 0 Mori: 1 Kyoya: 3 Twins: 1 KyoTama: 1 Renge: 1**

**Scoreboard(reviews): Tamaki: 3 Hikaru: 2 Kaoru: 1 Hunny: 1 Mori: 2 Kyoya: 5 Twins: 2 KyoTama: 0 Renge: 0 **

"Oh! See, Haruhi! I'm winning!"

"Tamaki-senpai, it's only the beginning of the story!"

"Tamaki, I am only losing by one point."

"Ah, we got votes!"

"Takashi! Takashi! Someone voted for me! But, I didn't want to waste their vote…"

"Mitsukini, they voted to make you happy."

"Okay, whoever voted for Hunny gets another free vote." That was me.

**Alright, as I said, whoever voted for Hunny, you get another vote because apparently he doesn't want the vote. Alright, the tallies are up so far and the results have changed rather drastically. But that's because of the story. However, just because Tamaki's leading right now doesn't mean that Mori can't suddenly come from the ground and blow him out of the water. I'm pretty sure none of you are going to vote for Renge, right? Because if not, I'll get rid of her from the scoreboard for reviews. Anyway, that's the end. I guess I didn't do episode 8. Next chapter.**

**Current Winner: Tamaki**

**Side Note: I DO rewatch episodes for these kinds of things, so if it takes awhile to update, it's because I need reference from episodes.**


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